I was discharged and put under the care of a kidney specialist. I soon came to see a new flaw in doctors. She was very competent but had set opinions. These were based on her considerable experience but didn't cater to individual needs.
A significant event happened after 2.5 years. I switched off the TV after the final of a seven-part British drama and was thinking about a few of the issues raised. Quickly, I realised something unusual was happening - I was thinking. For 2.5 years, I'd done little thinking. After a few weeks, I was able to answer my wife's questions about the accounting jobs she was trying to get done. It started with five minutes a day and eventually got to a few hours a day. But until this day, I'd effectively been a vegetable in the evenings.
In 2019, I discovered that doctors had not expected to see any significant improvement. Lesson three is that we need to always hope. My time on dialysis meant I got to know a little about a few other people. The few who had no hope sadly stood out. Everyone else (including most of those far worse than me) made their own life, and the lives of those around them, more enjoyable. Before I had another operation (much later), I was given a major meeting before the surgery. They gave me a 5-6% of dying on the table. At the end of the meeting, they asked us to go home and let them know if we wanted to proceed. I said I didn't need time - my recent life had not been worth living. I did not want to be like the guy who was only taking dialysis to survive a bit longer.